Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize