Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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