i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
