Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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