The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
what day is it and did you see me today?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
