That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
We had to coat check the pizza.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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