and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I seem to have left my pride at pride
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
