i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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