This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
