We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We left the knife in your bed.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
