Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
either way he was missing a nipple.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
