wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Randomize
