But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
