ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
