i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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