"it" just moved
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
