I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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