She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Holy sore nipples Batman
I love you. Go after that dick
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
