"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
