Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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