why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
only you would photoshop your dick
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Randomize
