She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize