is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
