that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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