dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
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