Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
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