His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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