at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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