I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize
