Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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