Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
