Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
