I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
