This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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