let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
