so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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