Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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