just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
