yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
