I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
