You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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