he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
