have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
