If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
