i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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