you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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