Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
