just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize