so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
