He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
